Religious Tolerance?

Just had a corker of an email from a mate in Canada : -

Subject: Why Can't I own a Canadian....

Dr. Laura Schlessinger is a radio personality who dispenses advice to people who call in to her radio show. Recently, she said that, as an observant Orthodox Jew, homosexuality is an abomination according to Leviticus 18:22 and cannot be condoned under any circumstance.

The following is an open letter to Dr. Laura penned by a east coast resident, which was posted on the Internet. It's funny, as well as informative:

Dear Dr. Laura: Thank you for doing so much to educate people regarding God's Law. I have learned a great deal from your show, and try to share that knowledge with as many people as I can.

When someone tries to defend the homosexual lifestyle, for example, I simply remind them that Leviticus 18:22 clearly states it to bean abomination. End of debate.

I do need some advice from you, however, regarding some of the other specific laws and how to follow them:

When I burn a bull on the altar as a sacrifice, I know it creates a pleasing odour for the Lord - Lev.1:9. The problem is my neighbours. They claim the odour is not pleasing to them. Should I smite them?

I would like to sell my daughter into slavery, as sanctioned in Exodus 21:7. In this day and age, what do you think would be a fair price for her?

I know that I am allowed no contact with a woman while she is in her period of menstrual uncleanliness - Lev.15:19- 24. The problem is, how do I tell? I have tried asking, but most women take offence.

Lev. 25:44 states that I may indeed possess slaves, both male and female, provided they are purchased from neighbouring nations. A friend of mine claims that this applies to Mexicans, but not Canadians. Can you clarify? Why can't I own Canadians?

I have a neighbour who insists on working on the Sabbath. Exodus 35:2 clearly
states he should be put to death. Am I morally obligated to kill him myself?

A friend of mine feels that even though eating shellfish is an abomination -Lev. 11:10, it is a lesser abomination than homosexuality. I don't agree. Can you settle this?

Lev. 21:20 states that I may not approach the altar of God if I have a defect in my sight. I have to admit that I wear reading glasses. Does my vision have to be 20/20, or is there some wiggle room here?

Most of my male friends get their hair trimmed, including the hair around their temples, even though this is expressly forbidden by Lev. 19:27. How should they die?

I know from Lev. 11:6-8 that touching the skin of a dead pig makes me unclean, but may I still play football if I wear gloves?

My uncle has a farm. He violates Lev. 19:19 by planting two different crops in the same field, as does his wife by wearing garments made of two different kinds of thread (cotton/polyester blend). He also tends to curse and blaspheme a lot. Is it really necessary that we go to all the trouble of getting the whole town together to stone them? - Lev.24:10-16. Couldn't we just burn them to death at a private family affair like we do with people who sleep with their in-laws? (Lev. 20:14)

I know you have studied these things extensively, so I am confident you can help. Thank you again for reminding us that God's word is eternal and unchanging.

Your devoted fan, Jim

footie blogging

I'm sitting here, with Bill, Doreen, Anne, Kim and the Kids, in the lounge, watching Argentina v Germany on the telly. drinking Cusquena in honour of David & Karen Harcombe, who have just come back from Peru ( I know it's not Argentina, but it's close)

looks like Germany for the win.......... :(

Idea: I could copy Nick's 'Eat your way around the World ', and do a 'Bevvie around the world'. Watch this space..................

recent entries:-

Super Bock from portugal
Mahou from Alicante
Duvell from belgium
Kornenbourg 1664 from france
Waggledance from the land of Sven Goran Eriksson
Grolsh from Holland
Hoogarten from Tesco's..........

(it's been a hard week) :)

ooo, and I had a Peroni Nastro Azzuro from Italy in Castellamare the restaurant, not the town)

Saddam's Hunger Strike: Latest

From The Daily Gut : -

SADDAM Hussein has ended a hunger strike after missing just a single meal, it was claimed yesterday.The former Iraqi leader was said to have announced the protest after Shia gunmen murdered Khamis al-Obaidi, a senior lawyer in his defence team, on Wednesday.

But US military officials said Saddam - on trial in Baghdad for crimes against humanity - refused lunch on Thursday, then ate his dinner.

Going down.......

My internet connection at home went down on Monday, and I can't Blog from home at the moment. I hope to get it back soon; it's amazing how nervous I feel without it!

So please add this to my list of excuses for not blogging, as well as having meetings with prospective business purchaser's .

Happy Birthday Mum!

Photo of Mum in a school of production of Snow White and the Seven Weirdly Bearded Boys! She is the one in the crown to the right of the character in dark clothing.

Footie Joke

A German family head out one Saturday to do some shopping.
While in the sports shop the son picks up an England football shirt and says to his sister, "I've decided to be an England supporter and I would like this for my birthday."
His big sister is outraged by this and promptly whacks him round the head and says, "Go talk to your mother."
So off goes the little lad with the white and red football shirt in hand and finds his mother.
"Mum?"
"Yes son?"
"I've decided I'm going to be an England supporter and I would like this shirt for my birthday".
The mother is outraged at this, promptly whacks him around the head twice and says, "Go talk to your father."
Off he goes with the football shirt in hand and finds his father.
"Dad?"
"Yes son?"
"I've decided I'm going to be an England supporter and I would like this shirt for my birthday."
The father is outraged and promptly whacks his son around the head 4 times and says:
"No son of mine is ever going to be seen in THAT!"
About half an hour later they're all back in the car and heading towards home.
The father turns to his son and says;
"Son, I hope you've learned something today?"
The son says,
"Yes dad I have."
"Good son, what is it?"
The son replies,
"I've only been an England supporter for an hour and already I hate you German Bastards"

apologies

My avid reader (you know who you are) may have noticed an unforgivable lack of posts recently. this is down to many reasons:-

Big Brother 7 (yes, yes I know)
World Cup Footie
Wales vs Argentina rugby tests
A trip to Edinburgh
Ennui
The sale of my business falling through
Having to research Nanotechnology, write a set of questions to accompany an investigation, and rough out next years teaching booklet on the subject for my new school
Dylan's been ill (nothing to worry about, just quite a few sleepless nights)

I hope to resume normal service as soon as possible :)

I thank you

Salaam

Etc

South African satire, anyone?

From Mail & guardian online :-

The past 10 years of his life had savaged the dilapidated novelist. His cheeks, once chubby and flushed, were flaking onion-skin drawn tight over a mangrove swamp of burst blood vessels; and his eyes -- little round beads that had blinked quizzically from the back covers of 500-million paperbacks -- were useless egg-whites swimming in two oily pans. He sank deeper into his chair, and listened to the indistinct shrieks coming from outside, where his great-grandchildren -- Mary Magdalene, John-Judas Junior, Phil the Baptist and little Gomorrah-Sue -- were sticking knitting needles into a wax effigy of Dostoyevsky. A gentle stroll among the seed of his seed was just what he needed.

He called out for Jesus, and the Bolivian manservant appeared at his elbow.“Take me to the little ones,” croaked the old man. Young children always lifted his spirits. He adored them. They read whatever you put in front of them, and they hadn’t yet discovered ugly, degrading phrases such as “half-arsed research” and “pseudo-literary quasi-historical pigswill”. With any luck one could steer them clear of nasty influences such as school and atlases and the History Channel until they were 14 or 15, and by then they were too old to be reading in any case.

They had reached the long corridor, flanked by the great bookcases that contained his entire oeuvre, and he let his fingers brush over the leather spines. Somewhere here was The Devil’s Inquest, a critical triumph. “Brown at his space bar hammering best,” the Times had said. “Banality never looked this voluminous.” His son Golgotha had been less charitable, declaring it “total crap, like all the others”, but of course Golgotha had been older than 15 when he’d read it, so one couldn’t really trust his opinion.

“Which was your favourite, Jesus?” he asked. His manservant flinched, and began to sweat. “Señor Dan, you know I love them all ...”“But if you had to choose one.”“I think ... The Pimple of Maria.”“It’s The Virgin’s Carbuncle, Jesus. But yes, that was a splendid one. A professor, a beautiful girl, a race against time and sinister religious forces, a cataclysmic secret. How well I remember each of my plots.”Jesus didn’t go in for fiction, preferring celebrity magazines, but one couldn’t argue with sales. The Da Vinci Code 6: Hell Hath No Fury had done just more than 120-million copies in hardback, and the runaway success of The Michelangelo Poloni had even warranted a note, personally breathed on by Oprah from inside her hydroponic anti-ageing capsule, that said something about Maya Anjelou and triumphs of the human spirit.

Naturally there had been lean years. The Patrick Swayze Code had sold 26 copies, 22 of which were bought by Jesus; and 2014’s Jesus Versus Mohammad had earned him a fatwa and a hasty evacuation from Jakarta International Airport. (Age brought perspective, along with admissions that his research could have been better; but as he’d said at the time, safely strapped to the floor of the naval helicopter en route to the aircraft carrier, all he’d wanted to do was “go into hiding in a Hindu country where you could get a good curry”. Indonesia, India. It was a mistake anyone could make.)

Away in the west wing the writing pool was hard at it, and Dan Brown paused to listen as his latest works took shape. The foreman was promising that they’d be done with The Galilee Conundrum and Doubting Thomas: In the Bible, In the Closet by the end of the week, and Bsection was already well advanced on the plot of The Herod Phallus.

But work was a bore, and so he stepped out into the light of the garden.“Great-grandpa!” screamed the little ones, and he beamed, reaching out his arms. “Señor Dan!” screamed Jesus, and he hesitated. There was a curious whooshing, strumming sound, and a shadow crossed his blind old eyes. The grand piano, dropped by God from 80 000 feet, obliterated him in an atonal shower of splinters.

It was very dark and cold. The old man groped in front of him, his footsteps echoing. “Jesus?” he stammered.A silvery voice replied. “Nobody of that name here.”“Is this ...?”“Even in death he cannot resist litotes,” said the voice, and there was faint rustling laughter all around him.“When shall we make him start?” asked a silky voice somewhere below him. “Now,” said the silver voice. “Bring the Pen and the Eternal Ream. And when he weeps, you may scourge him.”

Happy Father's day

I had a great day today, starting with brekfast in bed, a dvd of walk the line , and a matching Johnny cash cd, AND a satchell to take to school. The boy's were smashing, and Hari was kevina.
All is well in the world.

Auld Rekkie

We have just returned from a fabulous weekend away in Edinburgh (sans enfants).

As usual, Kimmy managed to find us some excellent accomodation, in a self catering flat, on the 3rd floor of the above building, overlooking the Grassmarket, Edinburgh's version of Swansea's Wind street, or London's covent garden (sorta). We were right in the hub of things, just a stones throw (upward) from the castle, The Royal Mile, but on the other side of the town from Princes street, and the modern shops. You can rent the flat from rosalind.hume@btinternet.com, and the link is 25 Grassmarket (some nice piccies, too)

I was really suprised to see how compact Edinburgh is. Everything is within walking distance, or just a short bus ride away. Basically, it's built on a long inclined ridge, culminating in the castle rock at one end. The main road runs along the ridge, from holyrood house palace to the castle, the last bit near the castle being the royal mile.

Historically, the main shops fronted off this road, with 'closes' running at 90 degreees, down the ridge on either side. these were narrow alleys, leading to five, or six story accomodation blocks. one such close is Mary Kings close, uncovered recently, and now a guided visitor attraction, you can read about it here. We also visited royal yacht britannia, and hollyrood House Palace (which doesn't have a website)

you can see more piccies using google's new web album programme, picasa, here

Gold Frappr?

I discovered another cool net toy this week, www.frappr.com , an online mapping tool, chat thang, picture sharer et al. (and it's not a Google app!)

Talking about google, Nick sent me a rather cool link to Google spreadsheets, you can ask to be notified when its available here . it's an online spreadsheet, stored in the far off mists of cyberspace, that can be accessed wherever you are, or by whoever you want.

Wanna see the eviction?

Click here eviction

phoney texts screened by C4 ?

An interesting post on bbgossip.com about the on screen texts played by C4 after Sezer's eviction on Friday night: -

June 3 2006, 20:02:18 - choco

Wonder why the submitted text messages on the bottom of the screen during Sezar's eviction were about Richard? You are not alone. Eagle eyed viewers spotted the anomaly as consoling messages about Richard's "eviction" appeared on-screen during last nights eviction show. This development casts serious doubts on the possibility of viewers' texts actually reaching air. Obviously without proof we can only speculate, but the likely conclusion is that Channel 4 have pre-set fake text message streams on standby for each nominated housemate.

Therefore everyone contributing messages with the hope of seeing them on air, is simply adding funds to C4s profit making phone service. This could be rather embarrassing for Channel 4 if true.

Definitely maybe

Ever wondered what's the best Album of all time?

Definitely maybe, By Oasis, according to a poll at NME.com

The full results are: -

1. 'Definitely Maybe' - Oasis
2. 'Sgt. Pepper's Lonely Heart's Club Band' - The Beatles
3. 'Revolver' - The Beatles
4. 'OK Computer' - Radiohead
5. '(What's The Story) Morning Glory?' - Oasis
6. 'Nevermind' - Nirvana
7. 'The Stone Roses' - The Stone Roses
8. 'Dark Side Of The Moon' - Pink Floyd
9. 'The Queen Is Dead' - The Smiths
10. 'The Bends' - Radiohead
11. 'The Joshua Tree' - U2
12. 'London Calling' - The Clash
13. 'The Beatles (The White Album)' - The Beatles
14. 'Abbey Road' - The Beatles
15. 'Up The Bracket' - The Libertines
16. 'Never Mind The Bollocks Here's The Sex Pistols' - Sex Pistols
17. 'Four Symbols (Led Zeppelin IV)' - Led Zeppelin
18. 'The Rise And Fall Of Ziggy Stardust And The Spiders From Mars' - David Bowie
19. 'A Night At The Opera' - Queen
20. 'Is This It' - The Strokes

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hat tip. Harry's place

Making Hay whilst the sun shines

Bugger. I just noticed that it's the hay festival today. perhaps a future El Grupo Libros meeting venue?

Parc Gwledig Penbre

We had an excellent afternoon yesterday at Parc Gwledig Penbre or Pembrey country park to all you gringo's out there.

We spent a couple of hours on the most fabulous Cefn Sidan beach, building sandcastles and flying kites, in the fine company of The Ace's of Mumbles.

Then off to the barbie field, for a sizzling good tea, of snags & burgers, followed by football with the boys. we crawled home at about 9pm, a good time having been had by all.

I don't know why I have not bothered with this beach before, but we will certainly be going back.

For the love of Ada.........

Another potential for the next El Grupo Libros meet could be : - Ava Gardner by Lee Server
sounds like a good read, and a biog would be a departure from my norm, of historical/fact based novels. mmmmmmmmm we shall see.