Mark Brandon "Chopper" Read 1992

The real Chopper - judge for yourself

Who was that? - Chopper Ried!

A fictionalised version of Read was recently featured in several sketches on The Ronnie Johns Half Hour. Some of these sketches, such as "Harden The Fuck Up!", have gained a cult following among Read's fans in Australia and across the world. Chopper was portrayed by Heath Franklin.

The real Chopper? :-

Don't know how much of this I believe,

From Wiki

Read was born to an ex-army father and a mother who was a devout Seventh-day Adventist. He was placed in a children's home for the first five years of his life. Read grew up in the Melbourne suburbs of Collingwood, Thomastown, Fitzroy and Preston. He was bullied at school, claiming that by the age of 15, he had been on the "losing end of several hundred fights", and that his father, usually on his mother's recommendation, beat him often as a child. Read was made a Ward of the State by the age of 14 and was placed in several mental institutions as a teenager, where, he later claimed, he was subjected to electroshock therapy.

By his mid-teens, Read was already an accomplished street fighter and the leader of the Surrey Road gang. He began his criminal career by robbing drug dealers, based in massage parlours in the Prahran area. He later graduated to kidnapping and torturing members of the criminal underworld, often using a blowtorch or bolt cutters to remove the toes of his victims as an incentive for them to produce enough money so that Chopper would leave them alive.^[1]

While in Pentridge prison's H division in the late 1970s, Read launched a prison war. His gang, dubbed "The Overcoat Gang" because they wore long coats all year round to conceal their weapons, were involved in several hundred acts of violence against a larger opposing gang during this period. Around this time, Read had a fellow inmate cut both of his (Read's) ears off in order to be able to leave H division temporarily. While in his early biographies Read claimed this was to avoid an ambush by other inmates, by being transferred to the mental health wing, his later works state that he did so to "win a bet". The nickname "Chopper" was given to him long before this, from a childhood cartoon character. Several other members of Read's gang cut off their own ears after this incident.^{[citation needed]}

Read was ambushed and stabbed by members of his own gang in a sneak attack, when they felt his plan to cripple every other inmate in the entire division and win the gang war in one fell swoop was going too far. Another theory is that James "Jimmy" Loughnan and Patrick "Blue" Barnes wished to benefit from a contract put on Chopper's head by the Dockers. Read lost several feet of intestine in the attack. Ironically, Jimmy Loughnan was a longtime friend of Read's. Read was, at the time, serving a 17-year sentence after attacking a judge in an effort to get Loughnan released from prison.^{[citation needed]}

Described variously as witty, charismatic, sadistic, and frightening, Read admits to being involved in the killing of 19 people and a further 11 attempts. Many of his associates in the underworld claim that Read is prone to making up numbers to increase his own notoriety and the sales of his books. Read himself has stated on numerous occasions that he would "never let the truth get in the way of a good yarn."

Ronnie johns: Chopper Reid - Heimlich Manouver

first aid cont...

Chopper Reid Resuscitation

My First Aid Course

Loser, Beck - Southpark

What? that'd be good done by the Southpark Guys? did you say?
well, ok then!

Beck - Loser (Live 2003)

live

Iron Man

Soy Un Perdedor

In the time of chimpanzees I was a monkey
Butane in my veins and I’m out to cut the junkie
With the plastic eyeballs, spray-paint the vegetables
Dog food stalls with the beefcake pantyhose
Kill the headlights and put it in neutral
Stock car flamin’ with a loser and the cruise control
Baby’s in reno with the vitamin d
Got a couple of couches, sleep on the love-seat
Someone came sayin’ I’m insane to complain
About a shotgun wedding and a stain on my shirt
Don’t believe everything that you breathe
You get a parking violation and a maggot on your sleeve
So shave your face with some mace in the dark
Savin’ all your food stamps and burnin’ down the trailer park
Yo.
cut it.
Soy un perdedor
I’m a loser baby, so why don’t you kill me?
(double barrel buckshot)
Soy un perdedor
I’m a loser baby, so why don’t you kill me?
Forces of evil on a bozo nightmare
Ban all the music with a phony gas chamber’cuz one’s got a weasel and the other’s got a flag
One’s on the pole, shove the other in a bag
With the rerun shows and the cocaine nose-job
The daytime crap of the folksinger club
He hung himself with a guitar string
A slab of turkey-neck and it’s hangin’ from a pigeon wing
You can’t write if you can’t relate
Trade the cash for the beef for the body for the hate
And my time is a piece of wax fallin’ on a termite
who's chokin’ on the splinters
Soy un perdedor
I’m a loser baby, so why don’t you kill me?
(get crazy with the cheese whiz)
Soy un perdedor
I’m a loser baby, so why don’t you kill me?
(drive-by body-pierce)
(yo bring it on down)
Soooooyy....?em
llik uoy t'nod yhw os ,ybab resol a m'I rodedreP nu yos
[It's the Chorus backwards]
(I’m a driver, I’m a winner; things are gonna change I can feel it)
Soy un perdedor
I’m a loser baby, so why don’t you kill me?
(I can’t believe you)
Soy un perdedor
I’m a loser baby, so why don’t you kill me?
(Nlehh...)
Soy un perdedor
I’m a loser baby, so why don’t you kill me?
(Sprechen Sie Deutsch hier, Baby!)
Soy un perdedor
I’m a loser baby, so why don’t you kill me?
(know what I’m sayin’? )

Uncle Derek

http://www.thisissouthwales.co.uk/southwalesnews/Swansea-golfing-fanatic-s-fairway-heaven/article-1678427-detail/article.html

Swansea golfing fanatic's fairway to heaven

Wednesday, January 06, 2010, 16:00

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TRIBUTES have been paid to a golfing fanatic who travelled the world but was never happier than when in his beloved Swansea home.

Derek Philip Stevens passed away on Christmas Eve.

The 78-year-old former chairman of Langland Bay Golf Club had suffered a long battle with vascular dementia.

Originally from Folkestone, Kent, Mr Stevens spent his retirement years in Langland after spending part of his childhood in the city.

"To Derek, Wales was his adopted home where he spent many of his happiest years both as a boy and in retirement.

"He used to call himself an adopted Welshman," said his wife Anne.

Derek spent time at Dynevor School in Swansea after being evacuated to South Wales during World War II.

He later joined HM Customs & Excise and was posted to Inverness where he developed his love of single malt whisky and golf.

After a stint with HM Customs in London he was posted to Dar-es-Salaam, Tanzania, in 1963 where he met Anne, and they had three children, Karen, Bruce and Geraldine.

As a training officer for local customs staff in Africa he continued to play golf, was captain of the Dar-es-Salaam rugby XV and president of the Dar-es-Salaam Gymkhana Club.

Mrs Stevens added: "Feedback from those who worked with Derek over the years was that you always knew where you stood with him, he got things done, encouraged staff to always focus on a positive outcome.

"He commanded the total respect and the affection of staff at every level."

Mrs Stevens said her husband was a private person, loyal to his friends and someone who could not abide injustices.

"He even wrote to the sports editor of the Daily Telegraph when his great niece, an accomplished young junior golfer and others like her, received no coverage despite their achievements," she added.

Derek returned to work for HM Customs in Folkestone in 1971.

He joined the Department of Employment in 1978 and 10 years later got his dream posting to Swansea, where he immediately joined Langland Bay Golf Club. He later became a member of the board and club president.

Current chairman Tony Vaughan said: "Golf was his passion, along with his wife Anne. He was an outgoing character and a popular figure here. Everyone knew him as a lovely man, a charming gentleman."

On retirement in 1991 Derek was presented with the Imperial Service Order by the Queen for his work in the civil service.

His ashes will be scattered on the 16th green at Langland on January 16 and his family will hold a celebration of his life at the clubhouse.