She Spat, playfully.......

Tonight I shall mainly be listening to:- (one - in an occasional series)

The Bonzo Dog Doo Dah Band - Big Shot

I am the Big Shot.
You heard me right the first time.
Name of batchelor Johnny Cool.
Occupation: Big Shot.
Occupation at the moment: just having fun.
What a party that was - the drinks were loaded and so were the dolls.
I narrowed my eyes and poured a stiff Manhattan.
Then I saw... Hotsie.
What a dame.
A big, bountiful babe in the region of 48-23-38.
One hell of a region.
She had the hottest lips since Hiroshima: I had to stand back for fear of being burned.
Whiskey wow wow. I breathed.
She was dressed as "Biffo the Bear".
In that kind of outfit she could get rolled at night... and I don't mean on a crap table.
It's kind of revealing, isn't it?
Revealing? It's positively risqué - I like it.
She said: "You're a man with a thousand Gs, right?"
"A thousand what?" I quipped.
"G-men, girls, guns, guts. You're my type."
"Wrong, baby" I slapped her hard.
"I'm a `L' man: strictly liquor, love and laughs."
She stared over my shoulder: "Play it cool, Johnny."
Play it what? I flipped.
"Listen, I fought my way up from tough East Side New York. Lead-filled saps and sub-machine guns, like this." [gunshots]
She said: "Johnny, this is a deadly game, have a few laughs and go home.
I shuddered.
Normally I pack a rod, in pyjamas - I carry nothing but scars from Normandy beach.
I said "Wrong, baby, you can't fool me."
She spat playfully.
"I'm ahead of you, Johnny."
I studied the swell of her enormous boobs and said:
"Baby, you're so far ahead it's beautiful."
"You, you are, you are eccentric, I like that."
"Electric cheri, bonk off my rocket, tu comprende?
" We spoke French fluently.
Our lips met again and again.
"Yeah, yeah yeah" I slobbered.
Hotsie said: "You're slobbering all over the seat, kid."
I went home late.
Very late.
What could I say to my wife?
"Darling, I've been beaten up again.
" Let's face it: she's credulous as hell.
A punk stopped me on the street.
He said
"Have you got a light Mac?"
I said: "No, but I've got a dark brown overcoat."


genius