Holy Hair, Batman!

Why cant religions make their mind up about hair? I'm assuming that they all believe that their God/Gods created humans with hair, so how can it be bad? Why do so many insist in hiding it? I've heard an argument that visible female hair can inflame men with lust, but its never had that effect on me. Big hairy women? I think not.

Breaking it down:-

Protestant Christianity; men hats off in church, ladies hats on, the bigger & frillier the better. 

Catholicism; men hats off, unless you are a child molester, then some very funny hats for varying degrees of holiness. Popes max hattage, bishops full chess piece hats, priests various?

Monks, tonsures! Just one zone of hair is bad, obviously. Nuns varying degrees of dishcloth craziness - the crazier the better 

(Nb, some Christians who criticize Muslim hair hiding seem to be ok with nuns....)

Greek orthodox; crazy hats, full-on hermit beards, ladies shawls a-plenty.

Islam; men hats on in mosques, beards, no moustaches. How does that work? Are moustaches evil per se? Have monk's tonsures been misunderstood, or just moved south? ladies from full body covering, no hair showing, to no coverings at all. Moustaches allowed. Ladies:- 

Judaism; men little hats on at all times, big hats for special occasions, or more extreme forms, ladies scarves? Also I must mention men dancing.

Sikhism; don't cut that hair! Damn you! Wrap it in a sheet. 

Buddhism; loving the bald look with a tiny ponytail 

Fascism; MAGA baseball hats made in China

Some imponderables:-

Why do Greek men have thick bushy moustaches? To remind them of their mothers

Secondary concern, men wearing dresses.